I can find better things to lie about than my sexual preferences


I was just reminded of a time, many moons since, when I was - I kid you not - lectured at by a gay man that I absolutely must be a lesbian. His reasoning? I had short hair and wasn't wearing make-up. He absolutely refused to believe me. Now, let's get one thing straight (other than myself), there's nothing wrong with being a lesbian - and I certainly wasn't offended or upset about being called a lesbian - I just don't happen to be one. I still can't, to this day, understand what this guy was on about. If he was looking for an ally, he'd have had one; but the categorical refusal to accept what I said, was sure not winning him a friend that day. It was like he was trying to convince me I was a lesbian, and wasn't far off outright calling me a liar - and that's the part that pissed me off. Believe me, I can find better things to lie about than my sexual preferences.

Yes, I'm very dull. I'm a monogamous-preferring cis hetero. But clearly, to that guy, all the men I'd to that point known in a Biblical fashion, must have been a hallucination.

On a side note, the reason I didn't - and still don't - wear make-up, is because it's hard to apply something evenly or well, when you really can't see the left side of your face properly - or, indeed, really at all; and seeing the right side is questionable as well. I have never actually learned to apply anything other than lipstick.

I'll tell you what, Guy Whose Name I Can't Remember; the first time I acquaint myself with a vagina that isn't my own, I'll hunt you up and let you know.



2018 08 14 - 03:27

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